In a word, they just aren’t. Your instincts are never wrong. Every mother I’ve spoken to has echoed this sentiment.
Regrets are always about going against your own instincts
I don’t want to say regret like: to this day I regret doing or not doing something. But, decisions that have blown up in my face, and driven me to go back to what my gut was telling me to do.
And it’s not just me. I was at a wedding shower recently and the mother of the bride told a story about when she was pregnant with her second daughter, her first (the bride) had not been potty trained yet. The doctor put the fear of God into this poor pregnant woman telling her “you don’t want 2 kids in diapers at the same time” and so she dutifully tried to potty train her daughter even though her daughter just didn’t seem ready to mom.
And there was just so much crying. And it didn’t work at all. And she was pregnant + tired so she gave up potty training until her daughter seemed ready, after the second baby came.
I’m not saying you will avoid crying or you will get it right the first time every time.
Sometimes you will change your mind and decide to change your course. Or decide that what was the wrong decision 3 weeks ago is now the right decision, now that baby is a little older. It’s always up to you because you are the one who pays the consequences.
If you follow your gut and your decision doesn’t work out how you hoped, you learn something as a parent. If you follow someone else’s advice and it doesn’t work out how you hoped, all you learn is to not follow someone else’s advice.
How about you? Are you finding it easy to follow your gut with your new baby or your pregnancy?